Match PreviewsNews

Brentford vs Everton – Sunday 28th November – 2PM KO

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Can you be arsed?

I can barely be arsed. 1 win in 9, and off to Brentford who are a right bastard, and then the shite come to Goodison. What a time to be a Toffee. But we’ll still be there won’t we? We’ll still watch from wherever we are in the world won’t we? Because we’re fucking idiots.

We spend all week in between games, moaning about what’s wrong with Everton. Where the blame for the absolute fucking state we are in now lays. Whether it be Moshiri, Brands, Kenwright, a succession of dogshit managers. We still turn up, we still buy the merch. We still love Everton.

Are we part of the problem? We probably are. We love this club, despite supporting them being like being in an abusive relationship that we just can’t get out of, even though we know we’d be happier if we left. We know that when there are good time, they are very very good. But when was the last good time?

And sadly, I don’t think anything will change until we change. Moshiri won’t give a shit until he sees empty seats at Goodison. But we sell out every game, even though we are absolutely shite. So afterall that….it is actually our fault!

Exactly what was the plan for the City game? I heard Benitez say that he wanted to counter attack, but as if we could do that with this current squad. It was almost a success to only concede 3. Well in us.

City were beaten their last home game Crystal Palace. They took the game to City, which can be a risk, but came away with win. We turned up looking bloody clueless. I can’t listen to our manager anymore. He says a lot of words that mean nothing. This might be a record for me giving up on listening to our current manager. I know he’s been given a shitty hand to play with, but he knew this. We just need to see something to say he’s going to do alright here. I’m not seeing a thing though. Nothing. Yet.

He’s being twatted by injuries left right and centre. What the fuck is up with Yerry Mina?!! Alright for Colombia most times, been dead for us for ages. DCL has been pictured running about but no sign of a ball on his head yet. And it sounds like Allan might be out this weekend. Plus Gray and possibly Doucoure PLUS Richarlison somehow picking up 5 bookings already means he’s suspended. Now this is not the managers fault. Any decent top flight team has a squad to cope when this sort of thing happens. But we bring on Rondon.

Brentford away. Probably with a sold out away end. Again.

Last time we played Brentford we lost on pens. Because of course we did. Everton have been Everton-ing for a long time now.

But this time we go to their new ground which I don’t know the name of. Probably some shitty betting sponsor or something like that. Shame as their old ground was a classic. A pub on each corner, really tight to the pitch and looked like it might fall down any second. Football, real football. But hey, we’re getting a new ground too. When all that sand fills the dock in….anyone else think building a stadium on sand sounds weird? I’m sure they know what they’re doing….right?

Anyway, Brentford are doing ok in their first Premier League season and first top flight season in years. They started real well, and have given some big boys a right scare, but now find themselves on a similar run to ourselves. No win in ages but they do have some dangerous players. Not that I know most of their names. It’s a bunch of random foreign lads with the odd Brit.

I do like their manager though. He’s a much more likeable Klopp with a bit more madness to him. We’ll probably be linked to him when Benitez inevitably takes the blame for us being shit again this season.

Their usual keeper David Raya is decent, but he’s injured. Their back up keeper is Alvaro Fernandez who is not as good. SHOOT FROM EVERYWHERE ANDROS.

At the back it’s usually a 3 with names like Pinnock and Roerslev who I cannot tell you a think about and Pontus Jansson who has been around the block is a bit of a cult hero at Leeds to this day.

Wing backs are Sergio Canos who can’t defend and Rico Henry who is decent.

Midfielers of Ghoddos, Janelt and Norgaard I can’t tell you a thing about.

Strikers though I do know. Mbeumo and Ivan Toney are a nightmare. They’ll give any backline a game as we’ve seen already this season.

They don’t look much on paper, but they’re a team when with their crowd could overrun us. We’ve seen it a lot before.

3-3 draw.

As for Everton, we’ve still got most of our good players dead, but with a few potential returns in this game. Which in itself is scary because we have a history of bringing players back way way way way too early and they break down. But needs must.

And needs absolutely must.

Pickford in nets.

Same back line, which is a worry as none of them can seemingly defend. Was great to hear Digne talk about how Benitez has made him be more defensive……completely cutting off one of our main assist makers. Great move.

In the middle, Doucoure coming back will help, but let’s not pretend we’ve never lost when he’s been in the side also. Will probably sit with Delph in the middle if Allan is dead.

Townsend, Gordon, Gray…somewhere in the attack. Probably. Who else is there?! Anyone else fear that we’ve already seen Townsend’s wonder goal too early this season? Does he ever get more than one?

And then the striker. I mean we know it will be Rondon. But i’d actually prefer the great Turkish bald denier Tosun to have a go again. Especially as Benitez has already said those two automatically get in ahead of Dobbin or Simms. WHY!?!?!!?!

Wow, we are shite.

And that’s Everton. Feels so pointless going through our possible team these days. So few options to actually make a difference, but we should, SHOULD have enough to see off Brentford. But that’s easy to say, hard to do.

We have not won in absolutely ages, and no win here will be a real real worry. Brentford away is not easy. Then we know the. game after. It could be 1 win in 11 by next weekend. That’s poor. And worrying.

Worrying for us fans, worrying for Everton, and worrying for Benitez. We’ve seen managers this season sacked for much less.

Or.

We could just win both games and stop fucking about.

UTFT!!!!

COYB!!

Leave a Reply